Monday, October 17, 2011

Two Point Seven Million Thoughts

She makes me smile. The first time I saw her whatever I was saying before that moment was lost in translation. It was as if the entire earth slowed down as she walked past. I smiled...I smiled...and it took a while to gather myself. My GOD she's amazing. I attempted to continue my conversation but it was too late. That thought and all others were gone. This all happened at work so I wasn't sure if I'd ever see her again so I wondered to myself if I should go find her and introduce myself or if I should take the chance of our paths crossing once more. Just then I vaguely remembered seeing some sort of identification badge, which means absolutely nothing simply because people pass through wearing them all the time but no...I refused to believe that she was just passing through.

After my shift was over I casually walked around the building searching for something in particular and there she was. She was surrounded by patrons and co-workers but...she was there; a representative from another company promoting her products in our establishment. My entire body stiffened initially then released as a feeling I hadn't felt in years make its way through me from top to bottom. I smiled. As incredible as that moment already was, out of the corner of my eye, through the crowd of people surrounding her, I saw her smile back.

Two point seven million thoughts raced through my head on my ride home and thereafter. Who is she? How can I find out? Am I too old to feel this way about someone I don't know at all? Breathe in...and out...that's what I tried to do only, it happened in short spastic bursts.

I'd made up my mind that not only was I going to but I absolutely HAD to talk to her. As my luck would have it, every time I saw her, I was busy with a client yet I would always know exactly when to look up from my task to see her pass by. That smile. My God that smile. After a few days I saw her no longer and I started to give up hope and chalk it up as yet another missed opportunity. There was only one occasion where I almost caught her but...I was called away. With my heart in my hands and the closing theme from the incredible hulk series playing over and over in my head I decided to officially close the chapter that was still unnamed but as beautiful as a summer blue sky with billowing snow white clouds placed perfectly in the midst of the great expanse.

Hope is a wonderful thing, yes indeed because I never truly gave up. There was a part of me that refused to accept that she was gone and would never return to me. There was still a feeling of anticipation...and today, there she was. Just as I was leaving for the day, our eyes met and we smiled. As she was speaking to someone else those two point seven million thoughts raced through my head once more and I knew I had to do something quickly. I injected my own brand of commentary into their conversation. Not in a rude manner but just playfully enough to get her attention. Then I walked away. I could feel her. I knew she was there...right on my heels so I slowed up my pace just enough that were began to walk shoulder to shoulder and it happened.

She began speaking with me. It was as if we'd been friends forever and were "catching up". Our conversation flowed so naturally that any bystander would mistake us for long time friends. My mind took over once more...

"It's just a coincidence. We just happen to be going the same way."

"I know you're not getting off already" was the next thing that came out of her mouth.

I explained to her how long my shift was and she nodded in agreement that it was definitely time to go home. She then managed to let me know what her work hours were. I smiled as our conversation continued. She then made a comment about following me to which I replied, "I love being followed by beautiful people."

She paused...smiled...thanked me and placed her hand on my arm very tenderly then walked her fingertips down towards my elbow.

"My name is Mikayla."

I nearly melted as once again those two point seven million thought traipsed through my imagination again. We stood by the break room door and engaged one another for another minute or two and the man in me wanted more, he wanted to take the plunge but the gentleman in me said wait, you know who she is, and where she is so now you can take your time and do this correctly.

Before parting she asked if she'd see me tomorrow, and my answer was yes. The smile across her lips was enough to let me know that this could possibly be the beginning of something. It also blinded me to the fact that I had an audience of male co-workers observing what had transpired. I was greeted with a thumbs up and several looks of amazement that said "you are that dude", and to be honest, I feel like that dude.

Tomorrow cannot come soon enough.

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